The no list

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Learning to say 'no' gracefully is an important skill - it is a key to leaving us with energy and space in life for what is truly meaningful.

Perhaps more difficult to master but certainlty more important is learning to say no to ourselves. You might call this discipline.

We are always with ourselves; constantly making decisions, and negotiating in our minds. This can be mentally taxing, and we are always prone to bad decision making when we are fatigued.

One strategy is to form systems that remove self-negotiation, with decisions already made.

Forming a 'no list' is one tool we can use - a list of things, based on our personal values, that we will say no to. It is like a personal contract with ourselves. A no list can include anything from types of food, social activities, business transactions, purchases. Items on our list can change over time, but having a clear list can provide clarity to the decisions we make each day, and align those decisions to our values.