The Shrink and the Sage

"it is not the things themselves that disturb people but their judgements about those things"

- Epictetus

Insight: This stoic concept is often credited as being the foundation for Cognitive Behavior Therapy and Rational-Emotive Behaviour Therapy.

"If you kiss your child, or your wife, say to yourself that it is a human being that you are kissing; and then you will not be disturbed if either of them dies."

- Epictetus

Principle: We should not attach our emotions to worldly things.

• Definition: Flourishing.
• Reference: Aristotle saw eudaimonia as the highest goal of human life.
• Reference: Aristotle believed that pleasure was important to a good life, but more important is living in accordance with our nature as rational animals, growing our wisdom.
• Insight: Taking a scientific approach to eudaimonia is dangerous. If we treat things as a means to an end (relationships for happiness for example), we risk devaluing them and not seeing them as an end in themselves.

• Insight: The more options we have the more likely we are to regret our choice.
• Reference: Barry Scwartz book.
• Principle: Go for good enough, not perfect; cultivate gratitude for what you have.

Insight: To raise our awareness of the interdependence of all things Thich Nhat Hanh suggests listing our significant achievements and our worst failures and shedding "the light of interdependence on the whole matter to see that the achievement is not really yours but the convergence of various conditions beyond your reach", and that "failures cannot be accounted for by your inabilities but rather by the lack of favourable conditions".

Insight: We should be encouraged to let go of the self-centred belief that our success and failure begins and ends with us.

"Wash the dishes relaxingly, as though each bowl is an object of contemplation. Consider each bowl as sacred. Follow your breath to prevent your mind from straying. Do not try to hurry to get the job over with. Consider washing the dishes the most important thing in life. Washing the dishes is meditation. If you cannot wash the dishes in mindfulness, neither can you meditate while sitting in silence."

- Thich Nhat Hanh

Insight: Mindful awareness can help us notice the wonder in everything around us, not just the beauty of nature.

Principle: Bring mindful attention to everything, even the simplest things such as washing the dishes, or making a cup of tea.